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i was a jerk to myself until now

i was a jerk to myself until now

  In the past, I distracted myself… or tormented myself…enslaved myself? with the fantasy, illusion, delusion, obsession that I could get other people to do for me what me what I could only do for myself. … the simple gift of paying attention to my feelings,...
tantrums are messages from outer space

tantrums are messages from outer space

I’ve been reading, or trying to read, this collection of lectures by the physicist Richard Feynman. theoretical physicists spend a lot of time making things up. they test these ideas later to see if their theories actually hold. this is the way experimenting...
is loneliness a monster?

is loneliness a monster?

today i am starting, officially or unofficially, my new writing experience. i just finished printing another final final final final final revision of the novel i have been working on for the last, gulp, six years. gosh maybe seven years? i don’t have the balls...