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i’ve always suspected the feeling comes first but where does it come from?
a feeling comes.
there are no words for this feeling and really, let’s stop with the words for feelings.

WORDS ARE NOT UP TO THE TASK
better to use gods

let’s start with one word for a feeling: love
think how many feelings that has to cover

let’s try another: fear
are you serious?????

honestly, emojis do a better job than words
fear with tears
fear with laughter
fear with a cringe
fear with confusion

the feeling (FEAR) announces itself biologically… or somatically… IN THE BODY… and then, in the brain.
or is it visa versa?

then we have to look for a match. something in our outside world which expresses, reflects or embodies that feeling. OR we can blame something for the feeling and call it a trigger. but look behind the trigger and it’s just your own face looking back at you.

why do we have feelings? so we run from the lion and make babies with the big guy in the cave

okay that was a long time ago


why do we have feelings now?
to release or balance something.
to release or balance what?

to release tears? to balance anger? to get us to reach out for another person for comfort and then eventually make or raise babies? to reach out for food for comfort and thus feed the body machine? 

why do we have the capacity to understand all this or ask questions about it?
what good does it do?

the beach is mars
shells are space ships
dogs are aliens

go fuck yourself is not a nice thing to say

and where does the feeling come from?
the bottom of the sea. a crack in the ocean floor