Select Page


“The Sender is not a human individual . . . It is The Human Virus. (All virus are deteriorated cells leading a parasitic existence . . . They have specific affinity for the Mother Cell; thus deteriorated liver cells seek the home place of hepatitis, etc. So every species has a Master Virus: Deteriorated Image of that species.)

The broken image of Man moves in minute by minute and cell by cell . . . Poverty, hatred, war, police-criminals, bureaucracy, insanity, all symptoms of the Human Virus.

The Human Virus can now be isolated and treated.”

—William S. Burroughs, from Naked Lunch

Combat the Virus

1. Pick up the phone for a telemarketer and listen until the end of the pitch.
2. Admit that your fidelity stems partly from laziness and fear, in addition to love.
3. Take your clothes off in public.
4. Slap her in the face.
5. Slap him in the face.
6. Talk to the madman in dirty overalls who walks by your house every day.
7. Don’t just google that long-lost person, make a call.
8. Give away all of your money, every last dime.
9. Never apologize when you are planning to do it again.
10. Use a leash and scoop your poop.